davegrohlsfacialhair:

i recommend the creme brulee

i recommend you go away

(via kardashianvevo)

multipack:

pu$$y so cheap its pu¢¢y

(via scabbylasagna)

multipack:

pu$$y so cheap its pu¢¢y

(via scabbylasagna)

rapeshed:

this lady i havent talked to in 3 years asked me to babysit her kid tonight

and i was like

do you not remember the last time i babysat for you

(Source: pillory, via slutty-fetus)

kushroom:

so you’re saying I can win 5 iphones every day??? and all I have to do is give my credit card number on this website I’ve never heard about??? well slam me in my tender butthole sir you’ve just got yourself a deal

(via into-the-lions-jaws)